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Oprah to Honor Messiah with White House Christmas Special

Oprah to Honor Messiah with White House Christmas Special

HOLLYWOOD, D.C. – The queen of daytime and the king of borrowed time will team up for an unprecedented Christmas special scheduled to air December 13 on ABC.

Broadcasting live from Washington, Oprah Winfrey will reunite with President Barack Obama for the first time since January’s inauguration.

The network has already kicked off an extensive promotional campaign for “Have Yourself a Barry Little Christmas,” a two-hour event which will include music, interviews with the First Family, plenty of arugula and the lighting of the first ever White House Christmas Czar.

Viewers will be treated to performances such as “O Little Town of Washington” by The Dixie Chicks, Streisand’s rendition of “I’ll Be Homeless for Christmas,” and “Kenya Hear What I Hear?” an interpretive dance courtesy of school children from all fifty-seven American states.

Other music on the evening’s agenda: ”The First Nobel,” ”It Came Up For a Midnight Vote,” ”It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Crisis” and ”Bow to the World.”

The highlight of Oprah’s prime-time program will be a tribute to Barack Obama, the country’s first community organizer turned president, titled “Scandal’s Messiah” and featuring Chicago’s All-ACORN Community Choir.

Check local listings for time and channel. Voter discretion is advised.

Mao-y Christmas to The One and All

Mao-y Christmas to The One and All

WASHINGTON, D.C. – As the Christmas season approaches, visions of sugar plums dance in the heads of millions of Americans – millions of unemployed Americans who, in lieu of fruity hallucinations, would likely prefer paychecks dancing in their bank accounts.

For others, the holidays are overshadowed by concerns for the future of health care, free speech and the massive American debt dumped … more »

Big Obama Escalates War on Ungood

Big Obama Escalates War on Ungood

AIRSTRIP ONE, D.C. – The assault by the White House on perceived obstacles to the Obama agenda rages on. Today, already fully engaged in the war on Fox News, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin and hard-working Americans with good jobs, the President signed an executive order that brings the fight to a popular segment of the entertainment industry.

Effective immediately, Emmy … more »


A Very Barry Halloween

A Very Barry Halloween

WASHINGTON, D.C. – There was a full moon over Washington as Barack and Michelle Obama celebrated their first Halloween in the White House Saturday night. Finally taking a much-needed break from golfing and gardening, the President and First Lady hosted an extravagant invitation-only affair with a guest list limited to a … more »

Things Rush Limbaugh Never Said

Things Rush Limbaugh Never Said

WEST PALM BEACH, Florida – The pseudo-apologies and retractions continue to trickle in from pundits caught falsely attributing racist statements to Rush Limbaugh, but the conservative talk show king remains no less vigilant when it comes to protecting the integrity of his message.

To that end, Limbaugh has opted to stay one step ahead of his detractors by publishing a … more »

Obama Wins Cy Young Award

Obama Wins Cy Young Award

NEW YORK, New York – Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig announced late Friday that the recipient of the 2009 American League Cy Young Award will be United States President Barack Obama (0‑0).

The announcement shocked reporters, who gasped upon hearing the President’s name, and stunned a number of Las Vegas sports books, some scrambling to make good on a handful … more »

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